| - people really liked this note. so i decided to post it up here too, if anyone cares to read it.
10/19/08
Dear Hiro,
You know when people say, “you never really realize what you have, until its gone?” Well that is completely untrue for me. From the start, I knew we had something special. Something that people cant touch or destroy. Something that people envy or never had a chance to experience. We had found and defined true love.
The History of HIROTALIE.
Lets go way back…
It was always awkward for us to tell people how we met, but funny at the same time. We really didn’t mean to make it happen that way, but that’s just how it turned out. Xanga times…yes, that’s how we met, my seventh grade. I remember hearing his name from someone, and then I found his page, and I was like “Omg! That has to be the guy that my friend was telling me about. How many Hiros would I find? Not many, that’s him!” And what do you know, it was the same Hiro that I heard about. I know, this is all random.
We never really talked through xanga, just subscribed to each others blogs. Then there was myspace. Ohhh myspace, lol. I found him there again my junior year, and he asked, “Do I know you?” and I told him the whole story that I told him when I found him on xanga, and he was like “ohhhh, ok.” Then he asked me for my AIM screenname, which I gave to him, so since I gave him mine, I asked for his, but his response was, “When I IM you, you’ll know its me =P” lol what a dork. So one random night, I get an IM from a rAdiCalLigHTbuLb saying “hello (with the wink smiley)” I was away from my computer, so I never had a chance to respond back. I barely saw him online or I just missed him so I think it was like a month later, I IMed him first saying hi, and he goes “Do I know you?” and again, I had to explain who I was. And again, he responded, “ohh ok, I remember.” We didn’t talk much at that time, until facebook, January of my junior year.
I just got a facebook, so I was trying to find all the people I knew. And again, I found him on facebook. I can remember what his default picture looked like. He was wearing a hoodie and was outside in the dark. So I added him, and of course, AGAIN! He asked, “do I know you?” I was like wtf!? He has some bad memory, which I later found out that does, lol. So I had to explain myself for the fourth time. He forgot who I was four times!! Lol. We always talked about this, and he would always say, “I don’t know how I could forget you, I’m sorry!! I wont ever forget you. I could never do that. You mean everything to me.” and well I hope you’re right Hiro. Please don’t forget me when you’re up there…
From the many late night AIM conversations we had, I could tell at first, that he was a nice, chill kinda guy. Already, guessing the kind of person he was, I was already starting to get interested in him. We talked about a lot of stuff, mostly random things, but it was fun. He made me laugh, especially when we would argue about the weirdest things. We weren’t scared to call each other “gay, dork, jerk, ugly, etc” and say/ask the craziest things, so our conversations were endless.
Then finally, we met at the Battle of the Bamboo ’07. I remember perfectly when I met him. It was after the whole thing ended, and I was waiting for my friends, because they were part of the battle, and me, and two of my friends were sitting on top of the tables, and I looked somewhere, else, and then when I turned, all of a sudden he popped out of nowhere and was right next to me! It scared the crap out of me! He was wearing some zippered up hoodie, and had his hood on, and said hi. And the funny part was he asked, “Did you drive here?” I told him no, I didn’t and I asked why. He said, “I need a ride home.” LMAO. I felt bad, because I didn’t drive and I would’ve totally drove him home, but I got a ride from my friend’s brother. I can remember him looking so shy, and talking very quietly. I remember giving him a hug and saying good job for his performance. When I got back from Joy Yees, I remember talking to him online and calling me a jerk for not giving him a ride home, lol.
Then our conversations started to go on the phone. He said that he always sleeps late at night, and would call people. So I guess he started to call me, lol. He told me, I remember, when we were on our way to Old Orchard, he said “I call you because you would pick up, so I was like cool, she’s awake when I call, so that’s why I started to call you.” There would be times where he called everyday, then there were times where he didn’t call for a week. And those weeks that he didn’t call, I would be sad, lol. I would literally look at my phone and wait for his phone call. Knowing me, I am not the kinda girl that would call the guy. I am old fashioned. So I was bummed, but when he would start to call again, I was super happy. He said, “I didn’t want to call you every night and make you think I’m a weirdo.” But I never did. I loved our phone conversations.
We talked and talked and talked, on AIM and the phone, but we never really got to hang out, until June ’07. The first time we hung out was watching Knocked Up. If any of you seen that movie, wouldn’t you think that’s a weird movie to watch, hanging out for the first time!? Heh, I think so. It was so weird. I only went to watch it to hang out with him, and to get my joy yees bubble tea that I earned for taking up his whole facebook wall.
Then, it was July 3, 2007. He bussed to my house, and we drove to Mitsuwa, because he needed to get “stuff”. He said he needed hair dye, but he mostly just got a bunch of chocolate candy…ya fattie! which melted in the end.. sorry!
Seeing each other every weekend on a Friday or Saturday night, even sometimes both became a routined thing. It was always watching a movie, eating dinner, or walking around different malls and other places like Evanston. I always asked myself and many people, “I don’t know if Hiro likes me.” After hearing stories about his past, and how he was “the heartbreaker” I felt like I had no chance and he was just messing with me. Telling people about our “dates” and how he would pay for my ticket and dinner, (supposedly he never pays) and how we would always talk, people kept telling me, “Natalie, he likes you.” And I kept saying, “No, he doesn’t! He would’ve told me by now!” I was told by many people how I’m stubborn to not believe them…
December 6, 2007 came and that’s when everything changed. Reading the AIM conversations of this day made me laugh so hard. I remember we were chatting with each other online, and then he called me around 6, and we talked for like 2 hours. Then he fell asleep, for a little bit, woke up, called me back, told me he was gonna shower and will just talked to me online. We were arguing with each other and talked about stuff, then he said “I have to tell you something” and I asked, and he refused to say it, then he just said, “I’ll tell you later.” So I was like alright, I’ll ask you later tonight, I wont forget! So we were on the phone, and I kept asking about it and he was saying “no, I’ll tell you later.” I couldn’t wait because I really wanted to know. We kept arguing about it, but he wouldn’t give in. So then, I was like ok, fine! How about I tell you something, and you tell me what you’re going to tell me. This went on for hours and hours. Finally, it was like 2 in the morning of December 7, 2007. We both had a feeling what the other one was going to say, but we both didn’t want to be the first one to say it. That kept going on as well..and we were both saying how we would be so pissed, if it wasn’t the same thing. then I was like ok, fine! I’ll say it. Hiro always brings it up.
Nat: I…I…
Hiro: I..? yea…
Nat: I…I…I cant say it!
Hiro: yes you can! On a count of 3! 1..2..3!
Nat: I…I…can I spell it!?
Hiro: hmmm ok..
Nat: I…L…I…
Hiro: ok, ok…I like you too!...I should’ve said it first, maybe it would’ve been faster.
Nat: Oh thanx, you jerk!
LMAO, he always says “That’s the day she confessed her love for me.” How many people do you know that spells to someone that they like you? I’m sure you don’t know many til now.
I didn’t see him that Friday, but I saw him the next day. Saturday, December 8, 2007. We went to Evanston, and it was a very cold night. But of course, we went to the park. I chased him through the park, putting snow down his shirt, it was fun! Then we just sat down, but “our place” and we kept hitting each other and I kept blowing in his ear and he kept tickling me. Then that’s when the magic sparked...when he kissed me. It was so unexpected, and it felt like that “you can tell with just that first kiss” feeling. Whenever I think about it, I always get that good, happy, tingly feeling. After the park, I remember I was super cold, and he gave me his jacket to wear, and he held my hand when we walked back to my car. That was also the first time we held hands. That night was amazing. So simple, and so pure.
He told me that he’s surprised that he didn’t stop talking to me or tried to avoid me. Every time he told someone that he liked them, he would try to avoid them. He told me I was different and that I was special.
You know when you say those three special words, “I love you” its suppose to be meaningful and true? And usually, you would say those words when you’re in the relationship for a good amount of time? Yeaaaa, no. We’re not like that all. We told each other we loved each other before we were in a relationship – December 11.
I remember asking him, if when he first said he if he meant it. He told me, “I would’nt have said it if I didn’t mean it.” He’s not the kind of person to lie about something like that. We had this special connection with each other, and we both meant it when we said it to each other. We knew our love was going to be everlasting..
We went on dates every weekend, cept for that one week that we didn’t see each other for two weeks. We both thought we were going to die, lol. At this point, I was like wth! Why hasn’t he asked me out!? It was just really odd that he hasn’t already. Then New Years Eve came, and I invited him over to my house, because I was having a small get together with people. He was like, sure, I have nothing planned anyway. So he came, and met some of my closest friends. We watched Music & Lyrics, and we had a wrestling match with each other, which is on facebook! If anyone remembers, “Hiro, you just got man handled!” yep, that was from me! Lol. That was fun. Then it was almost midnight, and I didn’t know people were going to leave before it, so it ended up being me, hiro, and my parents. That was kinda awkward, but it was ok, haha. We had mardi gras beads on, and we threw coins in the air. And we had some sparkling cider, hahaha, when it turned midnight. We watched the fireworks on ABC and we listened to the songs that they played, like “Stronger” and his favorite song at that time, “How Far We’ve Come”. It was like 1215, and it was just us in the basement, and we were watching TRL and their rerun for New Years. When the Ball dropped in New York for that re-run, we kissed, lol. We weren’t able to kiss the real time because my parents were there, but its ok, as long as he was my first kiss. Then he FINALLY asked me out.
He would tell me, “I feel so lame that I didn’t do anything special to ask you out. But just know, I wanted to start off the new year with you.” Heh, that got me. I didn’t care how he asked me, I was always glad that he did.
After that, we started our adventure together (that will be another note). Every minute with him as always been amazing, and I will always cherish them.
He was always there at my worst times:
- Getting into a car accident from him tickling my knee
- Losing my license
- Speeding ticket
- The time I ran away
- Cotillion practices
- When I was feeling at my worst and would cry
- That time we got in trouble with my parents, lol
On the other note, he’s been there during the best times of my life.
- My cotillion
- Graduation
- Dance Show
- Orchestra Concert
- Birthday
- Girls Choice
- Prom
- Etc. so much I cant think of.
We both knew that we wanted to be together til the end, and we talked about our future together. Even though he was going to be at Ohio State, we knew that it would be hard, but we would work it out. We knew that our love was greater than anything and it would keep us together..and many people agreed.
What I never thought was about how people admired/envy, and looked up to us with the kind of relationship we have. We knew that we were different from other couples, but we never really compared ourselves with others. We knew that everyone is different, and we’re different as well. But we did say, we are an awesome couple, and yeaaa we are! Lol.
I never really realized how many people had envied us. People have told me that they wish that they had the relationship that we were in. The stuff that we had done for each other and always being there for one another. I guess I never realized that we were being “watched” by other people. I guess its because I was only focused on you.
I never really realized on how many people really looked up to us as a couple, til now. I was told by many that they look up to us and I think that’s a really nice thing. It makes me proud. And there were couples that have told me that seeing what we have, theres no way that they are letting their own relationship go to waste. Also, how couples are appreciating what they have for one another. We were “the couple to be” and that made me happy because, I can say with confidence that we were a strong couple. We had our fights, but we handled them well, we never went public with them, we fixed them ourselves. We cared for each other and was always there for one another. We had our serious talks and talked about everything and we weren’t scared to tell each other anything. I guess I can say, we looked like the love that people would see on movies, except ours is real. What WE have is real. I believe that our love has been a role model to others and has been a great impact in this world. We have done/shown something powerful, and I’m very happy and grateful to have done so.
p.s – oh and yess, you know how we never had a song? But we told each other, it will just happen, and we’ll just know. Well, I think “A Whole New World” is the perfect song for us. We both loved Aladdin, we talked about from time to time, we sent bumper stickers of it to each other, we sang it to each other, and well I think that should be our song….take me on a magic carpet ride..
This message is super long, I really don’t expect people to read it. But if you somehow can see this, I hope this will make you smile and laugh, because it did for me. Writing this made me happy. This is like my novel about us like what Allie did for Noah.
I miss and love you very much. I promise to keep all my promises I made and I hope to make you proud. I’m trying my best to be strong for you. I dedicate everything to you..
I’ll be waiting to see you. I’ll be waiting to be with you again.
Every new day is one day closer to be with you.
Love, your Eva,
Natalie
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